Dave Chapelle Almost Caused my Death

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Dave Chappelle



If I died of an asthma attack, just know it would probably be the fault of Dave Chapelle.

With a small NYC Broadway residency, Dave Chapelle has created mounds of lines, containing people of all races, ages and genders, that were ready for one activity. That activity was to kick back and laugh. He accomplished that and so much more.

Just to get a little personal, I didn’t like Chapelle’s work at first. I thought he was insensitive to my needs as an audience member and said some outlandish shit that couldn’t possibly survive more than a couple small stages. But what I didn’t realize was that he was ahead of his time.

His jokes weren’t funny to me because I didn’t know any better. I didn’t realize that in order to make life better, first you have to laugh about it. Found that out by attending college, the biggest, yet most serious, joke of my life. Dave said things that I always thought but never voiced, because I was too worried about sounding ignorant, or worse, racist against people with problems similar to mine.

Dave Chappelle Broadway
I would only wait in line for Dave Chappelle. A hot, sticky, muggy line of well dressed New Yorkers.

Yet I knew I wasn’t the only one thinking these thoughts, how could I be the only one living this life?

To watch Dave Chapelle again in college was like reinventing the wheel. Once this man started rolling through my YouTube history, I knew there was no turning back. Skit after skit, stand-up after stand-up, from a movie back to another stand-up, that I’ve probably seen twice already, this dude that I’ve never met told an audience stories about my life; stories that I used to hate because I wanted
different.

But now, I know better, and while I was creating my own Chapelle Marathon, mounds of work sat at my desk, begging for my attention. You know what I did? I laughed about it and did it all night before the due dates.

Without realizing my fatal mistake, I made this comedian an integral part of my life. Which may seem weird to most, but you have to understand that the best medicine I’ve ever discovered in my short, yet tumultuous, 25 years is laughter.

Anyone that makes me laugh with my gut, is most likely a close friend of mine till this day.

When I saw the billboard for Chapelle’s Broadway residency, I thought it was a bad joke. Why would he be on Broadway of all places, this dude doesn’t make people laugh through dance and song.

After a couple google searches, I found that it was authentic. Dave Chapelle, one of my favorite comedians, is in NYC and I don’t have a ticket. Like most people, I immediately went online and found the ticket information. I thought back to his first Netflix special where he stated that his tickets were only $80 compared to Kevin Hart’s $125. This made me particularly excited, because I could afford
$80 and still buy my $1.50 buttered roll in the morning. Then I saw the price of the cheapest tickets and realized, my buttered roll was out of the question.

Dave Chappelle Broadway
Like most minorities, I had to think twice about this decision. I wanted a ticket so bad, but could I give up my buttered roll for the next couple of weeks? Then I thought, when will this happen again? Just buy the damn ticket and give yourself something to look forward to. So, with a shaky hand, I bought the cheapest ticket, almost closed out the window when I saw the taxes, and proceeded to my usual routine, thinking to myself,

“I have a week and a half until this show comes, time to catch up.”

For a week and a half, I revisited every skit and stand up of Chapelle’s, and perhaps his work might have superseded my own work, but you know I just laughed it off. Whatever I didn’t finish I finished the next day. All I knew was that I had to prepare myself for this event. I wanted to hear all his jokes; from Uncle Toms, to crack sprinkling cops, to every transgender joke he’s added to his repertoire within the last 12 years.

It felt like I was studying for a final exam and I was determined to ace it.

The day finally comes; July 19 is here and 8pm couldn’t come soon enough. Everyone needs to understand I’ve been working hard for a while now and I really need this night to make me laugh. When I laugh, I let go. I bought this ticket (which is supposed to be $80) because I knew Chappelle would guarantee me a night of laughter. He did not disappoint. If his set continued just five minutes more, I would probably have had an asthma attack. Mind you he stayed behind for a Q&A afterward, so it’s by God’s divine intervention that I didn’t keel over.

His set incorporated jokes that only he could pull off. I will not repeat any of his jokes on this post, for fear of messing the jokes up. However I will say one of my favorite jokes involved one of the greatest phrases to come into existence. That phrase is, ‘shut the fuck up.’ Such a simple, offensive phrase that almost caused an asthma attack for me. If you are a fan of Chappelle’s work, then this phrase shouldn’t surprise you at all.

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Chappelle let the audience see that he is a regular guy, imperfect like the rest us, but with a wonderful talent to make it all funny.

The Q&A afterward was just as funny as the set. Chappelle let the audience see that he is a regular guy, imperfect like the rest us, but with a wonderful talent to make it all funny. I won’t spoil the rest for you, but just know that when you finally get the chance to see it, you won’t be disappointed.

July 19, 2019 will go down as one of the best Fridays of my life, so thanks Dave Chappelle. You are alright in my book. Now I am excited to see what you are bringing to the table with your new Netflix special. That’s right people! Sticks & Stones will premiere on Netflix on Monday, Aug. 26. This will be Chappelle’s fifth Netflix special.

So Mr. Chappelle I don’t know if you are ever going to read this post, but I have one thing to say to you… Bitch, you better go hard or go home.

“I hope this shit don’t make me famous. I don’t want to be famous, famous I want people to like me for who I am. Like a famous dude don’t never know why people like them.”

AOO the SimplisticMKJunkie

-Remember, never bite your tongue.