Random Writings is a series of assorted web content assignments originally authored for previously published, now-defunct websites. These pieces were additionally republished a second time with an added first-person introduction in hopes of making them interesting. The subjects are varied and (duh) random. While your randy writer has been previously paid for his artistic efforts, as anyone on this website must admit, it’s nice to have one’s writing read. Hence, this series.
Bananas: The Curative Powers
Nope. There will be no smarmy remarks about the curative powers of my “banana”. . . not gonna do it. This isn’t elementary school, right? What this is is your random writer’s first piece on food.
That may seem odd since his first column, “Would You Like Some Cheese With That Whine?” appeared on a website named todaysrecipepro.com but it’s true. Lest you doubt his qualifications though he earned Cooking merit badge in scouts. While he prefers not to cook, he has lived on his own so he can cook enough to avoid starving.
(Women he has dated know he will “put out” for pizza so this is no surprise to them.) Thus, without further adieu, here is a bit on bananas and their curative powers that will hopefully suit your “taste.”
The Hoosier Hotshots sing: “I Like Bananas (Because They Have No Bones)”. Indeed, there are several reasons to like bananas. Research reveals that bananas have curing powers.
What is fact? What is fiction? This piece will peel away the myth and reveal the meat. Bananas are healthier and better at keeping the doctor away than the proverbial apple. The following is true about bananas:
They are good for a natural energy boost because they contain three natural sugars. They contain vitamin B6 which regulates blood flow and therefore makes them a good treatment for PMS. Additionally, the B vitamins in bananas are also good at calming the nerves and combat nicotine withdrawal for those would-be non-smokers.
They contain tryptophan and are good for depression and Seasonal Affective Disorder. Bananas lower your glucose level and aid in regaining your stamina and recovering from fatigue. They help stimulate the production of hemoglobin and thus help fight anemia. Finally, the low salt and high potassium content help to beat high blood pressure and stress.
While bananas are not really brain food, they do make students more alert due to the potassium content. If you’re the kind to go out and drink too much with strangers you especially need bananas. They’re good for hangovers and morning sickness too.
They calm the stomach and regulate blood sugar levels. Since they coat the stomach and help eliminate over-acidity they fight ulcers too. Bananas have a natural antacid so they are even good for heartburn.
The fiber content makes them a cure for constipation. Some cultures even use them to lower body temperature. Even the peels are good for curing mosquito bites and warts.
(Personally, your randy writer will eat a bit of banana on occasion to prevent leg cramps. He has been told it is the zinc content that does the trick. Hey, even one leg cramp can spoil your Saturday night!)
“One banana, two banana, three banana, four . . .” You know ‘bout bananas so there won’t be anymore!